Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Oakmont caddies look to fill roles during U.S. Open, on and off the bag - TribLIVE.com

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

This crab emits light from its forehead, and scientists have tried to figure out why. - Farmingdale Observer

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Why do Americans and foreigners alike describe the USA as prudish? Why do I see nothing prudish about the USA society? USA feels like one of the loosest countries although Americans claim to be very reserved.

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I can read

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Jordan Ott hiring strengthens questions on Suns’ decision-making tree - Arizona Sports

I actually pay taxes

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Why did Meghan become a Hollywood actress before marrying into royalty? Was this against protocol and tradition for future royals who marry into the UK monarchy?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Are there any Indian wife swapping stories?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have a reading level above third grade

Do you need goggles for red light therapy?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know who the president of Turkey really is

Nintendo Switch 2 sets U.S. gaming record with over 1.1 million units sold at launch, best-selling physical games revealed - Nintendo Everything

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

650-foot mega-tsunami sends seismic waves around world and satellites captured the action - Earth.com

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

People Are Sharing Things America Actually Gets Right, And It's Surprisingly Heartwarming To Read - BuzzFeed

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t cotton to rapists

Vernon Reid on Why Sly and the Family Stone Were the Greatest American Band - Rolling Stone

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

If Russia needs the resources to fund the war in Ukraine, why doesn’t it throw open its doors to visa free western tourism? Enough people would be interested, & it would start to get some hard currency as €, CHF, £, SEK, $, JPY in the tills at shops.

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

How do I separate the vocals of two different people speaking in a single channel?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I can count

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I see through liars

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup